Leap of Faith

A fellow believer, it is nice to see that, and let me tell you something my friend, being a God-Fearing person is hard, and faith is another thing. I too have much trouble with faith, I am a God-Fearing man, and let me tell you, when things are not going right, then whom do you blame; Or find fault?? With God, certainly not, with Satan?? Sure, why not, he is to blame for quite a lot, and he makes the believer certainly blame God. But, let me tell you something, God is NOT to blame, Finding a Job, Moving, and a new Job is always good, and being a Christian IS hard, but we are taught that believing in Christ is the ONLY way to go, and why not?? God IS GOOD, I too am having much trouble, A couple of days ago, and last night, I wanted nothing more to do with God, I wanted to end my life, I have had a very troubled life, with much violence, hurt, and pain, but, it was my faith that kept me going, and never giving up, and fighting to the utmost, and being a Christ-believing man, or woman, faith is the very best thing going for Christians, and always having that will always make you much stronger!!!

I'm An Effing Christian!

Oh my gosh, I know it’s not just me when I say the following, faith is freaking HARD!

So, there are several changes I want to make in my life which include finding a new job and moving.  However, I am procrastinating in the worst possible way when it comes to actually looking for a job.  Why?  Because I am scared.

No seriously, as in shitting bricks scared.  —  I am terrified.  Terrified that I won’t have enough money, or won’t be able to find a place to live, or that the job will suck, or that the place that I think I’ll like will actually suck nuts and I will just want to go home.

You see, I want to move far, far away from where I currently live.  I’m kind of in a rut, I’ve lived in the same county for 90% of my life, only taking short…

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Nightmares

Nightmares never let you sleep!! I had a couple of really violent nightmares, and I was awaken very violently, I then sat on my front steps, crying so hard that It really hurt my stomach!! I have been suffering from nightmares for quite sometime, but these nightmares really had me going nuts, and I don’t think that I’ve ever been rocked like this before, and I’ve never, ever had been so scared of going back to sleep again!!! I know that this is no comfort, but your not alone in having nightmares!! The reason I’m writing, is because I wanted to let you know that you have a fellow man, whom suffers from this type of torture, and, to me, that is what nightmares are, nothing but torture, and for me, I can’t never remember what my nightmares were about. But, the fear is none the less real, and being scared of going back to sleep is none the less real. Thank you for sharing your thought’s, and remember, your not alone.

magicalpasties

Please excuse the probably inexcusable mistakes in the grammar of this, but i’m writing this more to get these things out of my head and on to the computer, so that maybe, MAYBE they leave me alone and let me sleep. 99% of this is based on my experiences pretty much every time i try and sleep these days, bear that in mind. They don’t like me telling you about how they work, i can feel them watching, but i’m going to take that as a sign that it will help me somehow… so here goes.

Nightmares:

It starts off pretty much the same way every night, i go to sleep at a reasonable hour for any teenager after a suitable fill of the internet, adventure time and psychological literature, with the red light of my clock flooding the room with a quasi light, allowing me to discern shapes and…

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